Family Reunion -- a Good Time for Family Planning


bzzSummertime brings a lot of family time. With family reunions, picnics, weddings, and other events, long-distance family members travel to gather. It is also the perfect time to do some planning for the future. With parents aging and their health and lifestyles changing, children need to discuss some changes and decisions that will be required in the near future. Parents should take the time to tell their children where important documents are kept and their wishes in case they need health care directives or are experiencing long-term care needs.

For those children who live away, the change they see in their parent's health and mental capacity may be alarming -- whereas siblings that have daily contact are working with these issues constantly. Here is the chance to compare notes and work together as a complete family in the long-term care planning process.

For well-and-active parents, this is a good time to hold a family meeting and share with your children your plan for long-term care. Tell them where financial and legal documents are located. Review health care directives, living wills, and long-term care alternatives.

Experience has shown that even families that are close can quickly grow angry, jealous, and hostile toward each other when an aging parent begins to need long-term care. If a sibling moves into the parent's home, others can easily be suspicious of ulterior motives and fear losing their inheritance. On the other hand, the child providing the elder care becomes bitter and feels there is no support or help from siblings. Pre-need meetings to plan before eldercare becomes imminent avoid these types of conflicts.

In its book, “The 4 Steps of Long Term Care Planning,” the National Care Planning Council provides guidelines and checklists for family planning meetings. Here's an excerpt from the book:

“The first step to holding a meeting, and perhaps the most difficult one, is to get all interested persons together in one place at one time. If it's a family gathering, perhaps a birthday, an anniversary or another special event could be used as a way to get all to meet. Or maybe even a special dinner might be an incentive.

The person conducting the meeting can be a parent or one person of a couple who are doing their planning, years before the need for care arises. A meeting on behalf of someone already receiving care or needing care in the immediate future could be conducted by that person or by a member of the family, by an adviser or a friend.

The agenda could be formal or informal. If you want a formal agenda, we suggest using our care planning checklist as the agenda. Copies of the care plan should be prepared prior to the meeting and presented to those attending. Discussion is encouraged and we recommend that the person in charge not dictate but encourage input from everyone.

After a thorough discussion of the issues and the presentation of the solutions to the problems that will be encountered, there should be a consensus of all attending to support the plan. If the plan needs to be altered to meet everyone's expectations then by all means do so if that can be done. But it is not always possible to please everyone so there must sometimes be compromise.

The end of the meeting should consist of asking everyone present to make his or her commitment to support the plan.

GET IT IN WRITING! All good intentions seem to be forgotten with time. It may be years after this meeting before the long term care plan begins. If there are vocal commitments to help with transportation to doctors, give respite to the caregiver or other commitments, write them down on the care agreement. You can even have each person put a signature to his or her commitment if you think that is important.”

The 4 Steps of Long Term Care Planning” by The National Care Planning Council

The U.S Department of Health and Human Services states:

“No one wants to think about a time when they might need long-term care. So planning ahead for this possibility often gets put off. Most people first learn about long-term care when they or a loved one need care. Then their options are often limited by lack of information, the immediate need for services, and insufficient resources to pay for preferred services. Planning ahead allows you to have more control over your future”.

https://www.longtermcare.gov

"Whether you plan a formal meeting with an agenda or informally gather for a discussion, when the family is together make it a point to start the long term care planning process.

There is a lot to learn and many decisions to make concerning finances, health issues and legal work. It may take research and a lot of time to put a plan together, but if everyone is involved it will work, and be worth it." National Care Planning Council, www.longtermcarelink.net

Become a Member of the National Care Planning Council

Join the NCPCSeniors and caregivers search online everyday for eldercare services and frequently find our web site. Last year, longtermcarelink.net averaged over 32,000 unique visits per month. We have become an important resource for people looking for help.

We invite you to become a member of the NCPC. Your membership will include an advertising listing(s) on our site, your own personal sales (web) page, and access to the member section.

Senior Services
from our Members

Long Term CareThe National Care Planning Council is dedicated to helping the American public with senior care and long term care planning. Use the following link to locate eldercare services & help in your area.

Some of these services include Care Management, Elder Law, Estate Planning, Funeral Planning, Home Care, Medicaid Planning, Placement, Reverse Mortgage, and Veterans Benefits.

Books on Eldercare, Veterans Benefits, and Long Term Care for Seniors

The National Care Planning Council is a leader in providing books on timely subjects for long term care planning. Below are five of our popular books.

"How to Apply for Department of Veterans Affairs Benefits for Veterans and Their Survivors" (2024)

"The 4 Steps of Long Term Care Planning"

"Protect Assets from Nursing Home Costs: Medicaid Secrets"

"Support for Those Who Help Veterans"

National Care Planning Council